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  • Writer's pictureRavner

People can't argue with how you feel

How can you get someone who’s not willing to listen to listen?

We’ve all been there, engaged in a heated political debate we can’t stand yet can’t stop ourselves from prolonging. The other person just won’t hear the common sense in our words. Take heart! There is a way to get people to listen. Not change their minds, but listen. You see, people can easily argue with your views; they can attack how you think, but it’s a lot harder for them to argue with how you feel. So, next time around Trump, or Bibi, or coronavirus regulations enter the debate, tell a story. Describe to your counterpart how that general issue specifically applies to your personal life. I’ve given the “opening minds” workshop enough times to know that this method is by far the easiest to implement and most effective.


Instead of talking about gun control regulations, describe your kids and that screaming weirdo who lives at the end of your street. You want to know he can’t just buy a gun on a whim. Instead of talking about the Israeli Palestinian conflict, describe an experience you had in the Israeli army and how it changed you. Instead of talking about coronavirus regulations, share a story about a close family member who has been unemployed since March or has been suffering alone in the hospital’s coronavirus ward.

You don't have to be a good storyteller No dramatic skills are required - just be honest and remember to look into why an issue got you so emotionally involved in the first place. Again, people can argue with your views, they can’t argue with how you feel. Daniel P.S. Of course this behavioral economy approach can also be applied to marketing. In a big way. If I’m selling safety, you might be bored by my rating but not with a picture of my car after a car crash. If I’m selling growth, forget about my clients’ case studies. Let me tell you instead how I managed to overcome my own business’s glass ceiling, which for a long time felt like a permanent fixture. You get the gist.


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